A Color of His Own

There is a children's book that is actually one of my all time favorites.  Don't laugh - I know I say that about a lot of books.  But I love books so just bear with me, please.  This one really is one of my favorites, not only to read to kids but to read to myself.

Leo Lionni is the author and he has an amazing way of writing for kids but with a message for adults, too!  At least I find a message for myself in his books.  I know, I know, what does that say about my mind?  Maybe I think like a kid - is that such a bad thing, really??  I don't think so.  Anyway... the book is called "A Color of His Own."  The main character is - of course - a chameleon.  The little chameleon is searching to find a color of his own -- for on a lemon he turned yellow, in the heather, he turned purple and on a tigers back, well, you get the drift.  The chameleon thought perhaps if he stayed on a green leaf he would remain green forever, but alas, what with the seasons and all, in autumn the leaf turned yellow and so did the chameleon, later the leaf turned to a blazing red and so did the chameleon.  Finally he meets another chameleon much older and wiser to whom he tells his sad tale.  The older and wiser chameleon has an idea - he explains that they will always change color but if they stay together they will always be alike.  And so they do.  They were green together and yellow together and purple together and red and white polka dot together.  And they lived happily ever after.

Aren't we all looking for a color, so to speak, of our own.  A place we fit.  A place we feel comfortable and accepted.  A thing to do that completes us.  While this little chameleon was searching and searching to find his own color, he was missing out on who he really was.  He was failing to accept himself - as is!  It wasn't until he met a supportive, understanding, accepting friend that the little chameleon was able to see that he didn't really need a color all his own, he could be happy and content in exactly who he was as long as he had a friend in his corner.  

I think what we have to realize is that we are each made exactly the way we are supposed to be.    God does not make mistakes.  We should always just be who we are.  But we can't be islands.  We need each other.  And likewise, we need to not only be the "accepted one"  but we need to be the "accepting one".  For in being accepted and accepting of others and ourselves we find happiness. 

"Two people are better than one, they can help each other in everything that they do."
                                                                                                                       Ecclesiastes 4:9

The Love Fern

The Love Fern

When our daughter got married we bought a wrought iron heart shaped plant stand that had a Welcome sign on it.  We placed a beautiful small green fern in the stand and positioned it at the entrance of the wedding venue where each guest could see the Welcome sign and the fern and we hoped feel welcome.

After the wedding my husband and I brought the plant stand and the fern home.  My husband appointed himself the caretaker of the fern. He got no argument from me.   The plant stand was put in front of the house with a petunia in it and the fern found it's home under the patio cover in the backyard right outside the sliding glass door so we could see it.  She was lovely!! 

She liked the backyard under the patio cover and she grew.  She seemed very happy and she grew some more.  Finally she was outgrowing the small pot she came home in so my hubby transplanted her into a fairly wide, fairly deep pot.  And she was really happy.

My husband dubbed her "The Love Fern".  He may have taken that from the movie "How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days" starring Kate Hudson and Matthew McConaughey.  But don't quote me on that. Or it could be that she was named the Love Fern because she came to us through a wedding - weddings happen because of love - get it???   At any rate our Love Fern is the exact opposite of the Love Fern in the movie.  The irony of that is definitely something that would appeal to him.  

So, back to The Love Fern.  She just kept growing and more and more fronds were reaching and stretching their lush green arms.  Personally, I think The Love Fern is in love with her caretaker.  He lovingly transplanted her when she needed it.  He waters and feeds her lavishly and regularly.  His tender loving care is why she is so exquisite.  Perhaps the feelings are mutual and he loves her, too!  A friend was visiting recently and when she saw The Love Fern she was astonished.  She told me she had lived in Kentucky and had never in her life seen a fern so gigantic and she said - "I have seen ALOT of ferns."

There is a lesson to be learned here.  All things grow with Love/Love makes all things grow.  Not just plants, but people, too!  Love is the key to most everything.  Use that key freely, lavishly and regularly, when people need it and even when they don't and see what grows.

One last point - my husbands idea is to split The Love Fern and give a piece to each of our children.  The Love Fern will be shared amongst our family.  How totally cool is that?  Love isn't love until you give it away.

"My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you."  John 15:12

"This is my command: Love each other."  John 15:17

"Be kind and loving to each other."  Ephesians 4:32   

"The Love Fern"

   

The Week That Was....

The Week That Was....

Holy Cow - what a week!  And it's all good - very good!!!

So you probably have noticed that I haven't blogged in a while.  Here's why:

My father-in-law passed away in January of this year and the family has been unable to get together until recently.  My husband and I hosted his memorial service this past weekend at our home and the majority of the family came for it - even out of staters came.  It was WONDERFUL!!!  In addition to preparing for the out of town guests and the memorial, I was preparing to open a preschool which also started the same week the guests were arriving.  What was I thinking??????????

Anyway, here's what my week looked like....

Tuesday: Preschool opens, 5 family members arrive from out of town, process some Mary Kay sales
Wednesday: Preschool day 2, go to airport to pick up 1 family member arriving from out of town and all locals & out-of-towners come for the evening to visit
Thursday: Early morning graduation ceremony followed by graduation party, watch grandkids in the evening
Friday: 4 more out of town family members arrive, dinner for everyone, hang out visiting rest of evening
Saturday: family graduation party most of the day, dinner for whoever wanted it at our house, hang out for game night in the evening
Sunday: 2 more family members arrive, Set up and Facilitate the Memorial Service at the house followed by a BBQ for all 21 people then to pool party and pizza dinner with most everyone and another late night.
Monday: Prep for week 2 of preschool, short visits with family intermittently, process some Mary Kay sales
Tuesday: Day 1 of Week 2 of preschool.  5 family members stop by to say good bye then are off to the airport.  Following preschool pick up - run 'catch up' errands and go grocery shopping till dinner time.  Prep for Day 2 of preschool in the evening.
Wednesday: Day 2 of Week 2 of preschool, then trim roses in the back yard, make covers for kids tables and start to work on the July curriculum for church.  And Finally - some time to Blog.

So while the week was an absolute whirlwind of commotion - it was truly ALL GOOD!  We got to see and spend good quality time with family that we have not seen in many, many years.  It was precious to have that time together and to rekindle long lost relationships.  It was heartwarming to listen to the family speak of their dad with such joy and fond memories.  It was overwhelming to be thanked over and over for making a wonderful family time possible.

The week that was....precious, heartwarming, overwhelming and forever imbedded in my memory as one of the most wonderful weeks of my life.  Being surrounded by family is THE ABSOLUTE BEST!!!!  Hands down!!!  And that's Life!!!


"But if a widow has children or grandchildren, these should learn first of all to put their religion into practice by caring for their own family and so repaying their parents and grandparents, for this is pleasing to God."  1 Timothy 5:4 

"If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever."  1 Timothy 5:8




 

Comfort Food

Comfort Food

As I sat this morning with my nice hot cup of coffee eating a warm bagel with cream cheese, all was quiet and still and I thought to myself, how comforting this little morning time was.  There was no rushing around, no cars on the road outside the window, just peace and quiet, hot coffee and a warm bagel with cream cheese.   Ahhhhhhh!!!!

The quiet is always great - but adding the hot coffee and warm bagel was the bonus.  The hot coffee and warm bagel was the comfort.  Comfort food !

There used to be a show on TV called "The Closer".  The main character was a bright, quirky woman that worked at the police department to solve crimes.  On those days that were particularly challenging she would retreat into her office, close the blinds, sit at her desk and reach into her top right drawer for an aluminum foil wrapped Ding Dong which was a small chocolate and whipped cream cake.  As she took that first bite, she'd close her eyes and take a deep breath and as she released that breath you could feel the tension being released as the taste of the Ding Dong in her mouth soothed and comforted her.  When everything around her was chaos and craziness, she would go back to her comfort place and reach for a Ding Dong.  Her comfort food !

The term comfort food can probably be applied to any food that when eaten causes some type of mood change or causes a person to either become nostalgic or sentimental.  For example, our family has a very long tradition of having sauerkraut and dumplings with holiday meals.  Sauerkraut and dumplings don't cause any mood changes but they do have sentimental value for our family.  I was raised having sauerkraut and dumplings at holiday meals, as was my mother and her mother.   On the very few holidays that sauerkraut and dumplings was not on the menu, it was missed.   There was just something incomplete about the meal. 

There must be some kind of psychological olfactory need we have inside of us that causes food to give us comfort. I am certain though, that using food as a comforter can have a positive effect as well as a negative effect as in the example of obesity.  You have to be smart and somewhat disciplined to avoid that outcome.

For some people comfort food is chocolate, for some it is ice cream, for some it is meatloaf or macaroni & cheese.  Finding momentary comfort in a food is just that, momentary.  It is a temporary quick fix to what ails you.  Just as this morning, my hot coffee and warm bagel were momentary -- for within minutes, the dogs started barking at "nothing", my hubby woke up wanting to know what the plans were for the day, the neighborhood started to revive and the quiet comfort moment was gone.

There is however, a place where I can always find comfort.  It is not momentary.  It is not temporary.  It is not fleeting.   It is the place where God resides in my heart and mind.  I can go there anytime and He is always waiting with open arms to hold and hug me and give me comfort in those times I need it or want it.  He is merely a thought away!!  Ahhhhhhh!!!!

"Thou wilt keep him in peace whose mind is stayed on Thee; because he trusteth in Thee."  (KJV)
Isaiah 26:3

"May your unfailing love be my comfort, according to your promise to your servant."  Psalm 119: 76

"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us  in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God."  2 Corinthians 1: 3, 4
                                                                                                                

 

           

Sweet Answers

Sweet Answers

Did you ever notice how sometimes when you don't even pray for something, you get an answer?  What I mean by this is that God answers your spoken prayers - because He always does - but sometimes He even answers the unspoken prayers and the answer you get  is completely unexpected.  That is a sweet answer!!

For example, let's say you are embarking on a new adventure in your life.  You are certain it is what God has planned but there are a few material things that you are lacking.  Let's also say, you have not verbally asked God for provision, but in the back quiet recesses of your mind you've been thinking about it, knowing it was something that was going to have to be purchased eventually.

At this point, you are probably saying "enough with the supposes and let's says - just tell us what happened..."  Okay, here goes...

In just about a week,  I will be having a few children come to the house for a summer program.  Because of my years as a preschool teacher, I have lots of stuff - like a really lot of STUFF for preschoolers.  The one thing I was missing was a really nice wooden block set.  I have not really prayed that God would provide one but I knew in the back of my mind that it was something that I would need to purchase eventually.  The really nice ones are not cheap, therefore, it was put on the back burner of my mind.  So, today, I poked my head into the Salvation Army looking for some riding toys.  Way back in the corner of the store there is a table that has odds and ends on it and under it.  Under the table, pushed behind a shelf and a scale, I spotted a wood box.  The wood box still had  cellophane covering it and the wood looked really nice.  Well, I like wood things, so I tugged and pulled and guess what it was - a brand new Melissa and Doug 60 piece complete standard unit wooden block set.  A good one - solid heavy wood and beautiful.  The price was marked at $25.  Ouch!!  But I knew how much they go for in the stores so I was prepared to bite the bullet and just do it.  I take it to the counter and ask if they take debit cards - in my subconscious, I may have been hoping they didn't so I would have a reason not to spend the $25.  They did take debit cards.   So I place it on the counter and glance at the door - there is a sign that says "25% off all Bric a Brac today only".  The $25 tag labeled the Block Set as 'Bric a Brac' so I ask if I get 25% off today?  The answer is YES!!!   Oh my goodness, I am ecstatic at this point.  $20 for this brand new - perfect - complete block set. SCORE!!!!!!!! 

Folks, that is a sweet answer!!  A little gift from God, just because.  If you are really paying attention you can find these sweet answers all around you.  You catch all the green lights going to work on a day you are running late.  You go to take out the trash later than you normally do just in time to see that your neighbor is having trouble and you are there to help.  Or, just at the time you are thinking you'd like someone to help you in a project, a friend stops by and offers to help.

Some people call these happenings 'luck'; some people call them 'coincidences'.  I personally don't believe in luck or coincidences.   I have relinquished charge of the happenings in my life to the One who knows me best.  To the One who knows what I need, when I need it.  To the One who gives sweet answers even when I don't ask.  And He gives them.....just because.

  

Feelings

Feelings

Am I a victim of my feelings?  Is there hope?

I think there are 2 common attitudes about feelings:
1. We should do or say the right thing in spite of our feelings.  This means we should ignore our feelings - but even if we ignore them, one way or another they still come out.  Feelings in essence are controlling our lives even if we ignore them.
2. Feelings are everything.  If it feels good - do it.  If it feels right, it must be God's will.

Neither one of these attitudes sounds very healthy to me.  What does sound healthy, would be to become the boss of your feelings.  In other words, accept and acknowledge them and work on changing them if they need to be changed.  The Bible says we can do this by prayer and petition. (Phil. 4: 6)  The peace of God will protect your heart and emotions if you request that God do that.

Feelings are created by our thoughts.  I think it was Mary Kay Ash who coined the saying, "If you think you can, you will.  If you think you can't, you won't."  Disciplining your mind to dwell on the positive rather than the negative will make all the difference in your feelings about a thing.  I can change my feelings, therefore, by changing my thoughts.

We are in a war, according to 2 Corinthians 10:3.  The battlefield is in our mind.  We need to be disciplined enough in our thoughts to be able to bring them to God.  If my thoughts are disciplined, my feelings will be disciplined.

Enjoy this pictorial series of inspiration!!

Memories

Memories

They say the words "But you have your memories" when someone passes on or a person might think to themselves, "all I have left is my memories".  But what if you don't remember anything.   I read a book once about a little boy in the frontier times and his mom had died.  His greatest fear was that he would forget what his mom looked like or the things she said or did.  He feared it to the point of not wanting a new mom lest he love the new mom so much he might forget his real mom.  Memories can give comfort but they can also be debilitating.

My mom sent me an email the other day remembering that June 6, 1946 was her graduation day from Lourdes High School in Chicago, Ill.  68 years ago.  How does she remember the exact date???  Because, she says, "It was a sad day for me because my best friends would all be going different ways in life."  She even remembers what she and all of her friends did after graduation, she told me, "I became a secretary at LaSalle Extension University in Downtown Chicago.  My friends all became nurses, with the exception of two, who went on to college." 

I think emotions play a huge part in the things we remember.  How what someone said affected you, or whether you were ecstatic or sad play an important part in what you remember.  I don't really remember too much of my childhood for some reason.  I only remember the things we frequently talk about as a family.  After my mom's email about her high school graduation, though, I tried to remember any of my graduations.  There is one I remember that was kind of a bummer - right before my 8th grade graduation I got a permanent, well, it took...it really took...it really, really took and so when I was wearing my graduation cap, I felt like I looked like Bozo the clown with two puff balls of curly hair on each side of my cap.  It's funny, I've never seen a picture of my 8th grade graduation any where.  Maybe I did look like Bozo the clown and all the pictures got destroyed so I wouldn't remember.

I have found that sometimes it is best not to remember.  My hubby and I have been married for over 40 years and I firmly believe that being forgetful has played a huge part in the success of our marriage.  Letting go of things allows the freedom to move on and not hold a grudge.  Being forgetful doesn't let you bring up things that happened ions ago.  And that's a good thing.

Anyway, memories are what we have to keep us going and to give us those warm fuzzies of a life filled with love, laughter and happiness.  If your memories are not warm fuzzies, I challenge you to go out and make new ones.  My mom reminded me that it is possible.  She said of her high school friends, "We stayed friends for awhile, but as time goes by you make new friends and life styles change.  Guess "That's Life"."

Click below:  (Music and amazing pictures of Robert Redford and Barbra Streisand)
"Memories" by Barbra Streisand 

No Deal-Breakers!

No Deal-Breakers!

I recently wrote a blog about my cooking.  I readily admit I'm not the greatest cook.  My family learned to accept my lousy cooking and I am thankful for that.   I mean really, what choice did they have??  It wasn't like they could say - "Uh, mom, you're a lousy cook, that's a deal-breaker, we are outta here!" That aside, in thinking more about this, there is a lesson that gently melts and covers over my lousy cooking like butter melting on my patio blocks.  (i.e. my biscuits) 

I worked full time and was also raising 4 kids and caring for a household as well as serving in the church.  In the grand scheme of things, burning the biscuits practically was a-given.  I was dead tired, distracted by questions, and homework and the everyday goings on in a house full of people and dogs.  On those evenings that I served those hard as patio block biscuits, there were no complaints.  Maybe a few giggles, but no complaints.  I watched as each one spread butter on their biscuit and ate every bite!

In our home, my family recognized that life is not perfect, and people, including mom's, are not perfect.  They didn't complain but were gently accepting of my faulty cooking and loved me anyway.  Learning to accept another person in spite of their differences, in spite of their faults, with compassion and understanding is one of the most important aspects of a healthy relationship.

I have a little magnet on my file cabinet that says, "A true friend is one who thinks you're a good egg even though you're slightly cracked."  I think understanding and acceptance should apply to all relationships: parent - child, husband - wife and friendships.  And sometimes this can be hard!!

There is one relationship that never falters and that is your relationship with your Creator.  God accepts and understands and loves unconditionally, always.  There are no deal-breakers with God.



"For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God  that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."  Romans 8: 38 & 39

Garage Sales

Garage Sales

Never again!!! I told my husband, never again will we have a garage sale.  Holy Cow!!!
The work, the aggravation, the people, the mess...we did it right, kept it simple, everything was color- coded, clean, and marked, we had plenty of signage and it still wasn't worth it at the end of the day.

The sale was 3 days ago and I am still a little bitter about the lady that tried to talk me down on items that we already marked 1/2 off...tell me, where can you get a practically new ladies top for $1.50 or 2 brand new never used children's sippee cups for $1 or how about a brand name, never used clutch type purse for $3.  Puuuleeeese!!!!  Seriously, every time this lady wanted to add another item, she reduced her offer.

Some people have fabulous garage sales.  Some people, like my mom, make them fun!!  One time she had a garage sale and her gimmick was that everyone that bought something got a kiss.  Now, let me fill you in on this idea before you say to yourself  EEEEEEWWWW!!!! First off, it was in a retirement community, second, she's a hoot and hugging and kissing folks, just comes natural to her, third she didn't kiss on the lips - facial cheeks only.  Anyway, this one older gentlemen kept buying things, and of course, mom kept giving him kisses.  Finally his wife had enough and dragged him outta there. 

Another time mom and her friend had a 99 cent sale - everything was either 99 cents or 2 or three for 99 cents.  They did pretty well with that one.

Another time she put a clown costume on and held up a big sign inviting people in to the sale.  She got a lot of attention as Lulu the Clown.

At any rate, my garage sale was not nearly as fun as my mom's are and not half as profitable.  Maybe there is a lesson in that.  I figure with all the time we spent gathering, sorting, cleaning, marking, setting up, then the actual sale, followed by clean up and boxing up items we earned about $3.15 and hour each.  Not to sound proud or arrogant, but I think our time is worth more than $3.15 an hour.

So, we did get rid of a lot of stuff and we do have $126 to show for it so there is a little silver lining, but definitely not enough to make me want to ever do it again especially in light of the bargainer lady.  We did have a couple very nice people come visit our sale - one lady even gave me a tip - when I went to give her change from the dollar bill she gave me for her 40 cent purchase she told me to keep it that she got a really good deal.  I think she maybe was sent to make up for the bargainer lady.

So, live and learn, is what I always say.  The learning part is what is important.  I learned, I like to go to garage sales but I don't like having them.   So I won't.