Grandmothers

Grandmothers

I came across a poem written by poet Pam Brown that goes like this:

"The clock ticks.  The fire sputters.
The cat sings.
There's a knock.  Open the door - and
there is a smile and outstretched arms
and a splodgy kiss and a rush of feet.
And a day transformed."

That is how it was when my grandmother Kate came to visit.  The moment she arrived, suddenly there was more love, more laughter, more excitement and more contentment in our house.

I actually had two grandmothers growing up.  They were at opposite ends of the spectrum.  One was prim and proper, the other filled with hilarity.  One was a tad snobby, the other humble and simple.  One demanded she be served, the other was a giver.  One was tall, one was short.  We called the tall one Big Grandma and the short one Little Grandma.  Big Grandma didn't like that at all.  Little Grandma was cool with it and found it endearing.  Little Grandma was Grandma Kate.

Little Grandma loved to play games.  She invented a game called Ash Can.  I have no idea where she got the name but...it was Yahtzee before Yahtzee was even on the market.  When we kids would spend the night at her house we'd get to stay up late and play games.  Oh my, she would hoot and holler at those dice.  I may have gotten some of my competitive spirit from hanging around her so much.

I remember one time I was at her house for the weekend. While we were at the store I begged her to buy me those little plastic high heel shoes.  She absolutely would not budge from her resounding NO!  I put up such a fuss she actually had to punish me.  She never punished me.  I think I was about 6 or 7 at the time.  It wasn't until I was in my early teens that we talked and laughed about that incident.  She shared with me why she said no.  When she was a little girl she was playing and jumped off some stairs and broke her ankle.  Her family didn't have money to have her ankle set so it didn't grow right and was mishapen.  She had to have special shoes all her life and she had a little limp.  She said she thought those little plastic high heels were dangerous and she did not want to take the chance that I would hurt my foot like she did.  At 7, I would not have understood that, but as a teenager I saw just how much she loved me.  She loved me enough to say no.

Little Grandma did not drink alcohol.  But one very hot summer day she relented and had a Dacquari.  Of course, it hit her like a stone.  The adults were hysterical at her behavior, she was weaving all over the place and giddy and all of a sudden she announced she needed to go to bed.  So off she went and as she rounded the corner the adults started giggling and said to each other, "Grandma is loaded."  Grandma pokes her head out from behind the wall and says in a sing song voice, "I can hear you!"  Then off to bed she goes.

She grew up in the generation that wore stockings, not pantyhose.  Well, she had these big like rubberbands that held her stockings up and when she got comfortable she'd roll them down to just below her knees.  It was the silliest thing you ever saw.  But it was part of who she was.   

Little Grandma had a huge influence on my life.   She taught me to love sewing and baking and she taught me to crochet and she taught me how to polka.  She taught me to love life and have fun.  My mom is a lot like her.  As the only girl in the whole family, the two of them poured themselves into me.  Watching them and learning from them made me the strong, intelligent, creative woman I am today.  My mom has had the same kind of influence on my children and they love her to pieces, just as I loved my grandmother.

Grandmothers play an important role in the lives of their grandchildren.  It's an important job.  I pray I never take it lightly.

Thank You, Little Grandma.  I loved you then.  I love you still.